Time To Get Real

by PJ McClure on January 3, 2013

BrutalHonestyIt isn’t the most popular thing in the world, but it might be the most productive. Brutal, unfiltered honesty.

Anyone who has dreamed of bigger things in life has come face-to-face with dream to results mismatch. In other words; what you say you want does not match up with what you are getting. That’s a problem.

As much as I hate to admit it, I have hit that point multiple times in my life. The real kicker is that it has happened at each level of success. That’s the thing with a growing life… some of the same issues always show up at new levels, even if you have beaten them before.

Now take heart, that does not mean all is lost because problems reoccur. Each time you conquer an issue, you get stronger and wiser. Your reward for pressing through is a promotion of some sort to a new layer of success and challenge. As long as we see and stay aware of the potential issues, we can always overcome.

So back to the honesty part. We must be willing to see the problems and that requires us to admit they exist. Ouch!

I won’t pull you under the bus with me because this might not be an issue for you, but I have struggled at times in my life with acknowledging that my weak results were a product of a weakness in me. Admitting a weakness or blind spot is about as manly quiche, but much more beneficial.

A recurring weakness of mine is the tendency to over-relax after a major breakthrough. I will work like crazy to accomplish something, receive the appropriate promotion, and then get lazy. It might not look lazy to the outside world by comparison to what I have done formerly, but I am not bound by my former limitations. Since the breakthrough,  I have a whole new realm of capabilities.

The high level of effort required for a breakthrough is no longer high on the other side of the breakthrough. The ceiling of one level becomes the floor of the next. Just like a sky-scraper, our lives build progressively upward.

Only through a ruthless, personal inventory can I come to grips with this blind spot. By owning it I’m not required to submit to it though. The idea of exposing personal weakness and limitations is purely for the exposure itself. By definition, if I expose a blind spot… I’m no longer blind to it! 

Being honest with ourselves about weaknesses is not the solution to fixing them or nurturing the corresponding strength, but it is the first step. We can advance toward our dreams with more confidence if we can clearly see the obstacles. Use the pure light of honesty and shine it on the ground around you.

What has held you back?

Why were your efforts lacking?

Has this happened before?

Begin by seeing clearly and the path through the trouble will be easier to see.

Be your best,


Richard January 3, 2013 at 8:40 am

Thannk you PJ. A good question for me to ponder in my journal is what is / are my weakness(es)?

PJ McClure January 11, 2013 at 7:58 am

Find the weaknesses Richard, but as you know, don’t spend much time there. Our weaknesses are usually only our strengths overemphasized. Turn your attention there as quickly as possible.

Beverly Lewis January 3, 2013 at 8:20 am

True post. I’m a fan.When I read the email subject line, “The benefit of brutal honesty‏”, I cringed a little. Brutal honesty with one’s self is good. When someone else tells me they want to be brutally honest, I back up. I can take brutal honesty when it’s spoken in love, but without love, it’s just brutal.

PJ McClure January 11, 2013 at 7:57 am

True back Beverly. Brutal honesty is often done for the sake of the brutality. However, as you pointed out; brought from the position of love, even the most painful truth is like a salve.

Carol Schirr January 3, 2013 at 6:52 am

Very good article today! I can really identify with this.
Thanks for sharing this at the beginning of this new year.
It is a great time to get the weakness exposed right away and break
through that ceiling this year. I would like you to write more on this
same weakness of working hard and then letting down and give solutions
to breaking that cycle. Thanks again, Carol

PJ McClure January 3, 2013 at 7:46 am

Thanks for the feedback Carol! I’m a bit of an expert on that topic so I’ll make sure to bring more to the blog. Thanks again!

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